Search Blog
Search Blog

Homeschool and Socialization

Written By: Jenny Phillips Published On:

More and more, it is recognized that homeschooling offers great socialization benefits. Often now, when I tell people my family homeschools, I hear things like, “Oh, yeah, my neighbors homeschool, and their children are amazing,” or “I’ve thought about homeschooling; I’m so impressed with the homeschooling families I’ve met.”

All children need nutrient-rich soil as they grow: love, safety, the best of literature, truth, God, and family.

Several years ago, though, when people heard I homeschooled, almost always their first question was about social concerns. I’m glad recognition is changing because homeschooling is a powerful way to mold respectful, confident, happy children, and social concerns should not keep you from homeschooling.

Recently I met a family with five children from ages 4 to 13 years old. I was so incredibly impressed with the children’s confidence, manners, and just the light that was apparent in them that I turned to the mother and asked, “What do you do to raise children like this?” She smiled and said, “I homeschool them.”

This made me smile, too, because it was not the first time I had been impressed with homeschooled children. I have met a huge number of homeschool families through the work that I do, and the children themselves are testimony to the social blessings of homeschool. 

Famous Homeschoolers

Many parents fear that their children will be socially awkward if they are not in a classroom with other kids for hours a day.

We must not forget historical figures that had amazing, even powerful, social skills, even though they were homeschooled or mainly homeschooled, spending the vast majority of their childhood with their family: Thomas Jefferson, Thomas Edison, William Penn, Daniel Webster, George Washington Carver, Robert E. Lee, James Madison, Benjamin Franklin, Abraham Lincoln, James Polk, Theodore Roosevelt, Claude Monet, Winston Churchill, George Washington, Charles Dickens, C. S. Lewis, John Newton, Alexander Graham Bell, and many more. 

Dr. Raymond S. Moore said, “Research clearly verifies that the more people there are around your children, the less opportunity they have for meaningful social contact.”

Homeschooling: The Research
Author: Brian D. Ray, Ph.D.

What Does the Research Say About the Impact of Homeschooling on Academics and Social Skills?
Author: Rachel Wise

Homeschooling Statistics
Author: Multiple Sources

When you have a hard time finishing school

It truly is not being in a classroom with 30 other same-aged children a day that is required for good socialization. In fact, it can sometimes be harmful to developing good socialization. So what IS socialization, and how is it achieved so well by homeschooled children?

Socialization is defined in the dictionary1 as “a continuing process whereby an individual acquires a personal identity and learns the norms, values, behavior, and social skills appropriate to his or her social position.”

When children are surrounded all day by large groups of peers, the tendency is to base “personal identity” on popularity, conformity, social media, physical body image, etc. Consider these quotes:

“Parents and educators usually talk about sociability, but neglect to differentiate the kind of sociability they prefer. The child who feels needed, wanted, and depended on at home, sharing responsibilities and chores, is much more likely to develop a sense of self-worth and a stable value system—which is the basic ingredient for a positive sociability. One of the best ways for parents to help in their children’s social development is to become involved with them in the daily chores and activities in the home.”

—Dr. Raymond S. Moore

“I think the socializing aspects of school are ten times as likely to be harmful as helpful. The human virtues—kindness, patience, generosity, etc., are learned by children in intimate relationships, maybe groups of two or three. By and large, human beings tend to behave worse in large groups, like you find in school. There they learn something quite different—popularity, conformity, bullying, teasing, things like that. They can make friends after school hours, during vacations, at the library, in church.”

John Holt

"A family member asked my wife, ‘Aren't you concerned about [our son's] socialization with other kids?’ My wife gave this response: ‘Go to your local middle school, junior high, or high school, walk down the hallways, and tell me which behavior you see that you think our son should emulate.’"

Manfred B. Zysk

Remember that social skills are learned at home and in families, which are where our skills can also be tested the most. We shouldn’t forget that social skills don't just mean interactions outside of our family.

Watch Them Grow

I once heard someone say, “Aren’t homeschooled children like a plant grown in a greenhouse, and as soon as they are set outside, they just wither and fall over? Shouldn’t we put our children in hard situations so they can grow from trials?” My answer to these questions is that it is hard to grow a healthy plant in the first place in toxic soil.

All children need nutrient-rich soil as they grow: love, safety, the best of literature, truth, God, family. These things grow strong minds and hearts—minds and hearts strong enough to withstand the elements as they start to be set outside the greenhouse to be hardened off over time until they are ready to stay out of the greenhouse—strong and healthy.

It is important that homeschooled children, especially as they grow older, do have interactions with people outside their homes. Friendship and interaction are important, and some children naturally need more social experiences than others. See our blog post titled 50 Ways to Teach Social Skills to Homeschoolers. There are so many ways and opportunities for positive socialization outside of school.

If you feel homeschooling could be beneficial to your child but you are worried about socialization, put that fear to rest if you feel you can model good social skills for your child, get them involved in activities outside the home, and immerse them in books that model good socialization. For me, and for many others, the positives of socialization for homeschooled children is one of the greatest blessings and results of homeschooling.

1Dictionary.com

You may also like . . .

Join the Discussion

Please note, comments need to be approved before they are published.

Related Posts

  • Jesus, What a Friend in Sorrow

    Jesus, What a Friend in Sorrow

    Find comfort in the hymn Jesus, What a Friend in Sorrow. Learn the story behind the song and print the lyrics.

    Jesus, What a Friend in Sorrow

    Find comfort in the hymn Jesus, What a Friend in Sorrow. Learn the story behind the song and print the lyrics.

    Read more
  • Amazing Grace

    Amazing Grace

    Amazing Grace

    Read more
  • What Child Is This? Lyrics

    What Child Is This? Lyrics

    The Christmas hymn “What Child Is This?” tells of the humble birth of our Savior and the many visitors who came from near and far, bearing gifts for their King....

    What Child Is This? Lyrics

    The Christmas hymn “What Child Is This?” tells of the humble birth of our Savior and the many visitors who came from near and far, bearing gifts for their King....

    Read more
  • For the Beauty of the Earth

    For the Beauty of the Earth

    The lyrics in the hymn “For the Beauty of the Earth” are inspiring and timeless. Reflect on God’s precious gifts as you sing along with this gentle and lovely song....

    For the Beauty of the Earth

    The lyrics in the hymn “For the Beauty of the Earth” are inspiring and timeless. Reflect on God’s precious gifts as you sing along with this gentle and lovely song....

    Read more
  • My God Is So Great: Song Lyrics and Memory Verses

    My God Is So Great: Song Lyrics and Memory Verses

    Children often ask the question, “How big is God?” His greatness is bigger than any of us can imagine. Sing along with this beautifully illustrated video of “My God Is...

    My God Is So Great: Song Lyrics and Memory Verses

    Children often ask the question, “How big is God?” His greatness is bigger than any of us can imagine. Sing along with this beautifully illustrated video of “My God Is...

    Read more
  • The Farmer in the Dell: Lyrics & Story

    The Farmer in the Dell: Lyrics & Story

    Young children love singing songs about farm animals. “The Farmer in the Dell” is a fun song about a farmer who gets married, has a family, and fills his farm...

    The Farmer in the Dell: Lyrics & Story

    Young children love singing songs about farm animals. “The Farmer in the Dell” is a fun song about a farmer who gets married, has a family, and fills his farm...

    Read more
  • Hickory, Dickory, Dock

    Hickory, Dickory, Dock

    In the beloved telling-time nursery rhyme “Hickory, Dickory, Dock,” a little mouse runs up and down the clock every hour, making this rhyme a perfect tool for helping children learn...

    Hickory, Dickory, Dock

    In the beloved telling-time nursery rhyme “Hickory, Dickory, Dock,” a little mouse runs up and down the clock every hour, making this rhyme a perfect tool for helping children learn...

    Read more
  • My Gift

    My Gift

    Gift giving at Christmas has become a tradition for many families. The song “In the Bleak Midwinter” reminds us that we need only give one simple gift. Keep reading to...

    My Gift

    Gift giving at Christmas has become a tradition for many families. The song “In the Bleak Midwinter” reminds us that we need only give one simple gift. Keep reading to...

    Read more
  • The Wheels on the Bus

    The Wheels on the Bus

    Sing and move along with “The Wheels on the Bus” on the Kids YouTube channel. Keep reading to learn the story of the song. Then download and print the lyrics....

    The Wheels on the Bus

    Sing and move along with “The Wheels on the Bus” on the Kids YouTube channel. Keep reading to learn the story of the song. Then download and print the lyrics....

    Read more
  • Homeschooling with Babies and Toddlers

    Homeschooling with Babies and Toddlers

    Childhood is such a precious time, setting the course for the rest of a child’s life. Homeschooling with babies and toddlers is a busy season, but it is worth it!...

    Homeschooling with Babies and Toddlers

    Childhood is such a precious time, setting the course for the rest of a child’s life. Homeschooling with babies and toddlers is a busy season, but it is worth it!...

    Read more
  • This Little Light of Mine

    This Little Light of Mine

    “This Little Light of Mine” is one of the first songs many children learn in Sunday school. Its simple lyrics carry a big message! Sing along with this joyful song...

    This Little Light of Mine

    “This Little Light of Mine” is one of the first songs many children learn in Sunday school. Its simple lyrics carry a big message! Sing along with this joyful song...

    Read more
  • Happy Birthday to You

    Happy Birthday to You

    “Happy Birthday to You” is one of the most famous songs in the English language. These four simple words bring great joy to the birthday girl or boy. Keep reading...

    Happy Birthday to You

    “Happy Birthday to You” is one of the most famous songs in the English language. These four simple words bring great joy to the birthday girl or boy. Keep reading...

    Read more
  • Color Words Songs

    Color Words Songs

    Spelling color words is fun and easy with our beautifully illustrated gentle color songs and free downloadable PDF color words handwriting pages. Sing and spell along with the colorfully illustrated...

    Color Words Songs

    Spelling color words is fun and easy with our beautifully illustrated gentle color songs and free downloadable PDF color words handwriting pages. Sing and spell along with the colorfully illustrated...

    Read more
  • Old MacDonald Had a Farm

    Old MacDonald Had a Farm

    Old MacDonald’s farm is one of the most well-known farms around. The noisy animals make the farm a favorite among children. Keep reading to find out more about this song...

    Old MacDonald Had a Farm

    Old MacDonald’s farm is one of the most well-known farms around. The noisy animals make the farm a favorite among children. Keep reading to find out more about this song...

    Read more
  • Take Me Out to the Ball Game

    Take Me Out to the Ball Game

    “Take Me Out to the Ball Game” is one of America’s favorite songs! All who love baseball are familiar with the lyrics and tune. Keep reading to learn about the...

    Take Me Out to the Ball Game

    “Take Me Out to the Ball Game” is one of America’s favorite songs! All who love baseball are familiar with the lyrics and tune. Keep reading to learn about the...

    Read more
  • Baa, Baa, Black Sheep

    Baa, Baa, Black Sheep

    “Baa, Baa, Black Sheep” is one of the oldest English nursery rhymes with a very recognizable melody. Do you know its familiar tune? Here’s a hint. The melody is similar...

    Baa, Baa, Black Sheep

    “Baa, Baa, Black Sheep” is one of the oldest English nursery rhymes with a very recognizable melody. Do you know its familiar tune? Here’s a hint. The melody is similar...

    Read more
  • Away in a Manger Lyrics and Song

    Away in a Manger Lyrics and Song

    “Away in a Manger” is one of the most recognized and loved Christmas songs heard each Christmas season. How was this late-19th-century American hymn mistakenly credited to 16th-century German Martin...

    Away in a Manger Lyrics and Song

    “Away in a Manger” is one of the most recognized and loved Christmas songs heard each Christmas season. How was this late-19th-century American hymn mistakenly credited to 16th-century German Martin...

    Read more
  • We Wish You a Merry Christmas

    We Wish You a Merry Christmas

    Spread good cheer throughout the month of December with the song “We Wish You a Merry Christmas”! In this blog post, read about some of our favorite ways to share...

    We Wish You a Merry Christmas

    Spread good cheer throughout the month of December with the song “We Wish You a Merry Christmas”! In this blog post, read about some of our favorite ways to share...

    Read more
  • Over the River Lyrics & Story

    Over the River Lyrics & Story

    “Over the river and through the woods to Grandmother’s house we go” are familiar lines families sing on holiday road trips to Grandma’s house. But did you know the author...

    Over the River Lyrics & Story

    “Over the river and through the woods to Grandmother’s house we go” are familiar lines families sing on holiday road trips to Grandma’s house. But did you know the author...

    Read more
  • Itsy Bitsy Spider

    Itsy Bitsy Spider

    What nursery rhyme character has eight legs? In America, it’s the “Itsy Bitsy Spider.” In Australia and Great Britain, it’s known as the “Incy Wincy Spider.” Itsy Bitsy Spider  The...

    Itsy Bitsy Spider

    What nursery rhyme character has eight legs? In America, it’s the “Itsy Bitsy Spider.” In Australia and Great Britain, it’s known as the “Incy Wincy Spider.” Itsy Bitsy Spider  The...

    Read more